Hello God, It's Me Jennifer... and I Hear You Loud and Clear.

Be patient, be patient, don't be in such a hurry
When you get impatient, you only start to worry
Remember, remember, that God is patient too
And think of all the times when others had to wait for you

Freddie had a moment of nostalgia last week when the words of this song popped into his head during a moment of impatience... I can't remember if the person(s) succumbing to the impatience was him or the kids. Nevertheless, he got really excited because it brought back many warm memories and he began researching online the song the words came from and ran across a cd that his mother used to play for him and his siblings. Then, our children became obsessed with memorizing the lyrics so for a week I heard "Be patient, be patient.. la la la la.. la la." It was cute... and convicting. I have many faults and in the past I would say impatience was not one of them. However, recently, it gnaws at me like a beaver on wood (lame analogy but it gets the point across). Constantly chewing and causing stress. Does a beaver stress out wood? I mean, maybe in some roundabout physics sense? But, I digress...

I used to wonder how God speaks to people. Before I was a Christian I thought it was a ludicrous statement for someone to say "Well, God told me ....". Did you hear it verbally? Did He come to you in a dream? And, even after I put my faith in Christ and started to turn my life around to follow Him... I still didn't get it. Now, after a few years of praying and following Jesus, I can definitely look back (hindsight being 50/50 and all... or 20/20...whichever :) and see clearly where the Lord was leading me or things he was trying to teach me and usually it was through some hardship or difficult time. Sometimes I followed and sometimes I didn't and you can guess which scenario worked out best for me. Never was it through a spoken word. Often times it is a thought that would pop into my head, or a feeling that keeps nagging at me or, many times, it was something becoming very clear to me when before I could not see the truth at all - usually those were behaviors or attitudes he wanted me to change. One day it would be acceptable to me and the next day I would think what on earth was I thinking??? Now, my sinful self would follow that thought with "And what does such and such think of me??" and, for the longest time (like, my entire life), I thought that was ok. One day the Lord revealed to me that it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks of me. What matters is Him and if He alone is pleased with my heart. This issue is still a big struggle of mine. The Lord is still working with me through this and I can see (usually again in retrospect) situations he has placed before me that have, in a sense, tested me to see what I am putting first - my idol of what others think of me or Him.

It is no secret that I have been struggling with having a positive attitude about the new addition to our family - the white fluffy furball named Noel. She was a gift to my sweet Sophia for her 4th birthday. Sophia has had an affection for animals practically since birth. Freddie really wanted to get her a puppy and my first response was no way Jose! In an apartment? With three little kids? Did I mention.. in an apartment?? Then, after some cajoling and convincing and puppy dog eyes from Sophia, I came around and with a cautiously happy heart we adopted little Noel in February. And... ever since... the fleshy human part of me feels like my life has been turned upside down. She interrupts my schedule and my time playing with and schooling the kids. She leaves us presents all over the house. She chews up books and toys and shoes and computer power cords. She is stinky sometimes. I have to interrupt my routine and schedule to bathe her. She won't obey me. I have to walk out in the cold and rain and sometimes at midnight, for goodness sakes! Mini-hell on earth, right? Well, I share these thoughts with you not to complain.. yet again. I share these thoughts because the Lord has spoken to me through a Bible verse that I read yesterday while reading the book Beyond Survival: A Guide to Abundant Life Homeschooling - yet one of those random ways I sometimes hear from the Lord - and I was immediately convicted about these feelings and attitudes I have had towards this dog.

1 Thessalonians 5:15-18:

"Rejoice always, pray without ceasing and in EVERYTHING* give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you."

*Capitalized for emphasis... as the author in Beyond Survival said, everything means everything! Dog poop, rainy days, bad hair cut, husband gone for a week, dirty house, mounds of laundry to fold, inability to communicate effectively, burned toast... everything!

Now, mind you, I still have the thoughts. But, this verse pops into my head and instead of being impatient and feeling like my head might pop off my neck in anger I get perspective and realize that our God is in control of everything.. not some things... not spiritual things... EVERYTHING. Including our purchase of this dog. And, I am pretty certain now that his purpose in giving us this puppy was not simply to provide a companion for my Sophia. I think He is teaching me patience and how to find joy in all circumstances and to rejoice everyday and be glad in it.. regardless of how very poopy it may be.